I’ve been thinking about my calling lately.
Actually, it has been at the back of my mind since 2015. I’ve always thought that a ‘calling’ is that one thing I was meant to do because I was either talented or particularly gifted in a certain way. I constantly looked for the talents and strengths I had to anchor me to a particular field or purpose.
I watch out for my interests and dislikes and personality traits to find what God wanted me to do.
But in recent times I’ve found that I’m not always completely sure about the path I’m taking. Sometimes it’s because it’s too restrictive and it feels like I can and should be doing more. Other times, I just do not feel the fulfilment in what I am doing and wonder whether I missed it somewhere. I worry that my indicators are off. And at other times I think that how I feel is an example of my unsteadiness and inconsistency a flaw in my character that keeps me form working harder and pushing myself to fulfilling my call.
However, as I have continued to think and pray about it I find that the problem is not my attitude and a possible personal or emotional lack of consistency, it is in my understanding of what it means to be called.
A calling is not a one time discovery of an assignment. A calling, in truth, is not about you. Instead it is an awareness of the person who is calling you.
Moses, when he was called by God at the burning bush, was completely shocked and afraid of the responsibility of having to get people out of the land of Egypt. The massive weight of that responsibility coupled with the fear of having to return to a country in which he was a criminal fugitive to face and challenge Pharaoh’s authority, was to big of a challenge for him.
God knew this. He knew about all Moses’s limitations and weaknesses. He knew that he was not a talented speaker. He knew that he had murder on his criminal record and he knew that he had not lived amongst the people of Israel.
We often get excited in sermons when we hear about how God used this same Moses who by every standard should have been a good for nothing, was used to accomplish something so mighty. God made something marvellous out of nothing and he is still doing the same today.
We often forget that our little becomes a lot in the hands of the maker, not because he is seeking to perform wonders but because he is seeking relationships. Let me explain that a little more.
Moses was not chosen because he was a sorry case and God wanted to show how merciful he is. Or because he had been through so much. Moses and everyone else who has a calling is called for the purpose of relationship.
Moses was called to join the covenant relationship of his forefathers and his people. He was called because where he was with the Midianites was too far from where he wanted him. He was not spending time in the mountains praying and having face to face conversations with God about the future and destiny of the Children of Israel. This came much later after he had found his calling which was to worship God by being in relationship with him.
God’s number one aim is to draw us closer. Whatever that does not draw us closer to him is not part of our calling. Our calling is about the one who is calling us (God) and not about the assignment he is calling us for. We can be called to do anything, but the reason behind why we are called is God’s priority. The joy of being called is getting to know God.
“Many are called but few are chosen.” (Matthew 22:14)
That’s because we are all called to a face to face relationship with God through Jesus Christ. But few get chosen to perform wonders because we focus more on the assignment rather than on God.
We can’t part seas without God, we can’t fight Pharaoh’s army without him at our sides. We can only encounter discouragement in our assignment when we focus on the assignment instead of getting the assignment done with him. God gives us these assignment to draw us closer to himself and to bring us back to the place of our purpose.
Like Moses God’s call to us is to draw us out of obscurity and isolation into love and friendship with him. So, as long as I daily answer the calling, I will find my hands doing exactly what it is I am meant to be doing. Yes, my gifting are indicative but the greatest gift is to be both found and lost in the love of God.